2 months

Ruby at 2 months

---> She is wearing 3 month clothes, most of the 0-3 are getting too small or have been retired. (Not sure what she weighs, but we'll find out tomorrow at her appt)

---> She has had her very first hospital stay outside of birth... I'd care not to repeat this stat.

---> She loves being held. all. the. time. and loudly lets you know she is displeased with being put down.

---> She can hold her head up when placed on her tummy, but not for too long. And she screams the whole time.

---> She takes a really solid nap 2-3 hours in the afternoon, but in the morning, it's pretty irregular and sporadic

---> She eats about every 3 hours during the day, and still is giving us a good long stretch from about 6:30-2, and then from 2-6.

---> She recognizes my and mike's voice in a room, and crans her head around to find you

---> She grasps her hands together regularly, and is enjoying sucking on her hands

---> She seems to be very aware of your presence in a room, and if you leave, she begins to cry

---> She smiles and coos when you talk with her

---> She frequently falls asleep with a paci, but that's the only time she'll take it, or that I give it to her

---> Her favorite place to sleep is in bed curled up next to Mama, though, if she keeps pushing, I'm kicking her out.

---> Today, Levi leaned over, and said... I love you Ruby, and kissed her head. It made my heart melt a little.

---> We love her so much, and can't believe she's already been here for 2 months!

3 years!

My dear sweet little boy.

Today you are 3! How did that happen? 3 years ago today, I held you for the first time, I heard your cry, felt your little hands in mine for the first time. You changed my life forever.

at 3...

---> you are a non-stop talker. you talk about everything, and will talk to anyone who will listen. :)

--> you still love letters. you recognize all letters, upper\lower case, and know the sounds each of them make. you recognize your name spelled out

--> you are all boy. you love to throw balls ( you have quite an arm), kick balls, and run, jump, tackle, and wrestle anyone who will let you.

--> you are a train fanatic. it's not a thomas the train love, but just a general train love (for which our pocketbooks thank you)

--> you love building castles and better yet, knocking them down.

--> you love jumping on our trampoline

--> you can be pretty stubborn about some things, (no idea who that comes from ;), but overall you're generally a good-natured kiddo.

--> fav. foods... homemade mac n cheese, turkey, soup, eggs, any kind of black or red bean, potatoes, carrots, broccoli, you pretty much live on milk and or water

--> you still take 1 nap a day. you get up around 6, nap from 12:30-2:30ish, and generally go to bed around 8

--> you are very aware of your surroundings, and know where things are when we are traveling in the car

--> you have a handful of friends you like to play with, namely, the Goods, Rothells, Barclays, Davidsons, Bruggers, McClains, and Bowmans. :) (which is nice because we like their parents, too) :)

--> you are pretty much potty-trained with the occasional accident. you do still wear diapers to nap\bed, because mama doesn't want to do laundry every day, and i know eventually you'll get it. you're VERY close to being done with diapers during nap.

--> you are very particular about some things.. like you have to wear pj's for naptime.. you like things in their place and things done in the same order all the time.. :) its endearing and annoying :)

journeying

I feel like we've been on this more natural, more organic journey for a while. 6 years ago, I bought everything, I hardly cooked from scratch. Biscuits in a tube? sure, why not! :) Don't get me wrong, I knew how to do it, but it just seemed easier to not, and that was pre-kid. (ha!)

Slowly but surely, we began changing things. Partly, that came by happenstance the first year we had a garden. We found we really enjoyed it, and wished we had planted more, so the next summer.. we planted more. (and heaven only knows, we plant so much it's ridiculous now) I began cooking more, looking at recipes more, and hey, making biscuits from scratch? it's not so bad... pancakes, sure, why not? my own white sauce? sure... It eventually transitioned to breads... I can make bread for my family, and I know what's in it..

Then we switched to raw milk. you can gasp and think we're crazy, but we love it, and if we ever move away and aren't able to find a raw milk source, i'll be so sad.. why? Because I can make yogurt, and cheese, and butter, for pennies.. and I KNOW what's in it.

And cleaning supplies. I now clean mostly with vinegar\dawn. I recently started making my own disenfectant wipes, and I"ve been making our own laundry detergent for 1 1\2 years now.

I guess that's been the next transition. what is IN the food we eat, and to be honest? Sometimes, I don't want to know, because if I know, then I may just feel compelled to change it, and well.. that's not always easy, or cheap.

I feel like we're at that crux again. I'm looking more at food labels. Recently, I was beyond disappointed to realize that my trusty canned tomato soup has high fructrose corn syrup in it... really? is that REALLY necessary? so.. now I'm making homemade tomato soup.

I've been feeling challenged to try to reduce the amount of $$ we spend on groceries, and what's more challenging: how to reduce it, yet still eat healthy, and continue on this journey of less processed foods. I'm working to coupon more, and save money where I can, so I can reallocate monies to different parts of the food budget.

I'm thankful for friends I've met along this path, friends that inspire and encourage me to keep working at it, to keep learning. I'm thankful for how far we've come in 6 years. If you would have told me what I'm doing now, 6 years ago, I would have laughed at you. I don't say all this to toot my own horn, but more to record the journey we are on, and to realize it's not an overnight change.. it's been small incremental changes over the past 6 years that have brought us this far.

I don't offer up much information to most people about the stuff we choose to do, because I realize it's not for everyone, and I"m not going to say our way is the right way, it's just the way we've chosen to go, and that's okay. It's not often easy though, and often it feels very lonely. Most of the time, I get "you're crazy" looks when I tell people I make our own yogurt, (or whatever) but I've learned to let it be.

I'm thankful to be challenged, to be growing, to be working at being a good steward of what the Lord has given us, and learning how I can take the things I've learned, the talents I have, and give back to those who need it.

in the small things

There are days where I feel like I have our lives back in order after the hurricane of baby #2 came through... then there are days where I realize I have NO idea when I last cleaned the toilet, or scrubbed the bathtub. I miss the quiet of the house, I miss how easy it was with one, and somedays? I wish I would have appreciated that time a little bit more.

I love having two kiddos, but there are days that just feel long and hard, and I long for the days of going back to work. I'm back at work, but after I had Levi I went back to work work at the symphony, and this time, I'm back to work in our living room, which feels more cluttered, and mostly stressful as I race to beat the clock every day so that it doesn't look like a hurricane went through when piano students show up.

But then I'm reminded (thanks to bible study friends) that we are simply called to be faithful. So often we want to be faithful in big things, important things, like translating the gospel into a new language, going to africa, going on some big missions trip.. but sometimes? being faithful means wiping the snot from levi's nose for the hundredth time, being consistent with discipline, pointing out things in creation telling levi that God made it! I have to remind myself that it's about being faithful in those still, small moments... building faith moments with our kids, teaching them about the Lord, about His love for them, and about how we can love other people, even in the smallest of ways.

I need to be reminded of that more.

to the hospital and back...

6 weeks to the day miss ruby... We wound ourselves back to the hospital.
It all started on Tuesday, you had begun with just a small little cough. We happened to be at the pediatrician that day for Levi, and she said if Ruby gets this, we'll need to see her. Well, Thursday we trekked back to have you checeked out. The Dr. said you were not bad enough to go to the hospital, but you did have RSV and we did need to watch you very carefully, and if you got a fraction of an ounce worse we were to head straight to the hospital.

Well, Thursday night you began to become more irritable, you were refusing to nurse, and you began to retract... so at 3:30, you and I baby girl, began our trek to the hospital. Of course we were in the middle of a snowstorm and a normal 15 minute drive took a 1\2 hour. We arrived at 4, and were seen right away as there was no one in the ER.

We got in and into a room right away, and then the slow pain-staking ER wait began... We were moving along, but then the shift change happened and all went to pot. They had done a chest xray, a urine sample and that was about it. They were not giving you any oxygen at that time, even though your pulse ox was a low. I was extremely frustrated because they didn't seem to be concerned about you retracting AT. ALL. At first, they didn't seem to think you were bad enough to admit for RSV. They did the urine sample to see if you were dehydrated, and it came back with high white blood cells, but they thought it might have been a dirty sample, so then they did a catheter on you (yea, that was awful) and took another urine sample... but to find out if you had a UTI they had to do a 48 hour culture thing..(which for the record, the UTI never worked out to anything, which wasn't really surprising)

Meanwhile they finally got the pedatric dr on call down to the ER and when she heard you weren't nursing well and were lethargic she immediately said they were admitting you... so... at 3:30 yes. 3stinkin 30.... 11 1\2 hours later we were admitted to the hospital and got a room.

It was so scary Roobs... Mama tried so hard to be brave, and make sure I was doing everything in my power to help you. I was never so relieved as when they said they were going to admit you. I just knew in my gut that it was not good, I just had to convince them of it. I was so thankful the pediatric dr listened to my concerns.

Once we got to the ped floor, they got you going on everything which helped, but I think you had just fallen so far behind during the day because the ER did so little for you.... they couldn't believe i'd spent all day in the ER they thought it was crazy when they saw how much you was struggling to breathe, baby girl.......
Friday night you struggled to wake up at all to nurse, so I basically pumped. They were giving you fluids at that point so it wasn't quite as scary... early Saturday morning you began to destat quite a bit so they got you on some oxygen and called for a breathing treatment, and did this deep suction thing where they fed a small catheter tube down through your nose and sucked gunk out... throughout the weekend they sucked close to 300ML of fluid out of you..

Once you got the O2 you were able to nurse a bit more and you slowly improved ....they tried taking you off the O2 early last night, and you did well for about an 3 hours, but began to destat when you were nursing so they put you back on... around 1 this morning they pulled the O2 again and baby girl, you turned the corner, and it was so easy to see. your breathing became easier, you became more alert........ you were awesome, and by 10 this morning they'd pulled the O2, the pulse ox, and all the monitor junk off of you, which made it much easier to snuggle you.. all those wires attached made it hard to maneuver you around...
we spent the day up there today and they monitored you when you nursed and checked your diapers to make sure you were outputting a good amount and finally just before 5they said we could go home!!

Baby girl, we're so very thankful for modern medicine, for capable people taking care of you, and to the Lord for healing your little body. There were SO many people praying for you. I know of 3 churches who had you on their prayer chain, and so many people all over the country, and even the world, who were praying for you! There is nothing greater than knowing that you were in the hands of our Lord. We are so grateful and we give Him the glory.

And.. just so you know Ruby? You've earned your once in your life (at least while you live at home) trip and consequent stay to the hospital... Mama would like to never ever ever do that again. EVER. got it?

keepin it real

because its good to keep it real, right?

today has been hard.
H.A.R.D.

My day started with phone calls to my students to let them know I would not be teaching today. We are all just fighting fighting fighting this cold\sickness, and I decided maybe it'd be best if we just stayed home, and got some rest. One of those phone calls resulted in a conversation where they told me they would be quitting lessons. Its quite a large chunk of money that we'll be losing out of our budget unexpectedly, so that was really frustrating.

Levi has been so sick with his pink eye bout and then this cold, he has been whiny\cry-ey for the last 2 weeks, and truthfully? I'm on my last nerve. Then today, he took a 40 minute nap.. 40 minutes.... this is not long enough for our little boy, so then he was cranky, and tired... awesome. Today I was so fed up that I finally told him that our bedroom was a nocry room, and if wanted to cry fine, but Mama was going to stay in our bedroom and if he came in there, he had to stop crying to enter. I keep telling myself it's because he's sick, but I'm just so done with the whineyness... and it doesn't help that I don't feel good myself.. which by the way I can take nothing for because I'm nursing...

Enter Ruby... who now is also sick, and basically refused to be put down at all today.

Tonight Mike went to leave for band rehearsal and the car won't start. This happened the other day and we thought maybe a door got left open a crack... so now instead of rehearsal, he's on his way into town to buy and install a new battery on our car... and he's sick too, but being a trooper for all of us here at home...

So that's where we are in the Youngman house.
sick. tired. struggling.
because it's good to keep it real sometimes.

more sickos

i spoke too soon..

ruby now has it... praying hard for my little girl this morning.
this is not a fun cold, as i now have it full swing and know how miserable levi has been feeling.. i'm calling a truce today, declaring jammie\movie day, and hoping to kick it to the curb!


Lord, please protect her little body!

sick

our little dude is sick sick sick. we have been fighting infections basically since new years. after spending a lovely weekend with mike's family over new years weekend, we came home and battled pink eye. we beat that infection, and then levi got a cold, and man it's the motherload of colds.

he is so exhausted. he has a croupy cough, runny nose, glossy eyes, no appetite, and occasionally runs a fever, and today he randomly threw up. i took him to the dr today and they said it was just a virus, but he did have the beginning of an ear infection, so we're on amoxicillin for that. tonight he was in bed by 6:15, but he was up again an hour later saying he couldn't sleep. i can't blame him, i hear him coughing every few minutes.

praying he gets better soon, and that ruby doesn't get it...and for my own sanity, because a tired, sick kiddo is not the easiest person in the world to deal with.

and they all rolled over

Ruby rolled over today!!

I was so surprised, she hasn't had too much tummy time, but does always enjoy it. I was at a friends house today, and the boys were rough housing, so I put her in a PNP on her tummy... and she rolled right over like she's been doing it forever! I put her back on her tummy, and she rolled right back over onto her back..

How are you getting so big already, baby girl??

1 month old

How is it baby girl that you are already a month old? It seems like just yesterday I was still puking and wishing with all my might that you would come... and now here we are, a month out already... You've already experience, Christmas, New Years, and several holiday gatherings.

Since i've yet to record your birth story, we'll start there. Mama so desperately wanted a VBAC baby girl, you have no idea. I fought so hard for one with my OB, and in the end I could only convince him to schedule my C-section a week after my due date in hopes that you would come on your own. I knew my chances were slim though, as Levi was a week overdue, and I knew from my dates that you were due later than he insisted. It was not meant to be, and you were born via C-section on Dec 2nd.

The morning we drove to the hospital, your Papa and I FINALLY decided on your name. Ruby Kathleen. Ruby because we loved it, and Kathleen after my own Mom. It was snowing big beautiful snowflakes when we drove to the hospital, and it seemed so fitting for our december birth.

We checked in and headed to L&D. It was very different than your brothers birth as it was all scheduled. We did paperwork, got hooked up to an IV, and began prepping for the surgery. As luck would have it, a friend of mine from Mothers Club was actually the person who prepped me for surgery. Around 9:45 we headed to the OR. Then, better yet, a dear dear friend surprised me by showing up to assist in the delivery. She was a great support and encouragement to me during my pregancy with you and I was thrilled that she came in specifically to be a part of your birth-day.
At 10:23 I heard your beautiful wonderful cry for the first time. I longed to hold you, and by 11, I was able to hold you for the first time. You had been fussy, and the minute I held you.. you stopped crying, and nursed like a pro. What a blessing you were that day to our lives, Ruby. You changed us again, for the better, and we couldn't be happier.

At the hospital we were visited by so many people who love you.
Levi
Granna and Grumps
Grandpa and Grandpa
Auntie A and Uncle B
Uncle Dave, Aunt Liz, Logan and Bryce
Kevin, Meg, and Faelynn
Amanda, Ariel, Elise, and Sophie
Kent, Candy, Ellie, Evan, and Emma

At one month you....

---> Nurse about every 3 hours during the day
---> At night you will often give us one good 6 hour stretch from 6:30-1, I'm trying to convince you to move it from 10-5. please cooperate, ok? After 1. you're up around 4 and then around 7.
---> You are mostly out of newborn clothes and into 3 month clothing
---> You love being held all.the.time. and consequently, you live in the sling during the day
---> You have a hard time falling asleep without nursing
---> You will occasionally take a pacifier, though you prefer Mama
---> You really only cry when you're hungry, at night though, I often wake up to some squeaks and grunts, very rarely a cry
---> Occasionally you'll smile, though I'm not sure if it's a real deal smile yet.
---> Minus the first bath, you've seemed to enjoy them
---> You often have 2 really long quiet, alert times during the day. Once in the morning and once in the afternoon.
---> at your 1 month appt you weighed 10lbs 7 oz and were 22 inches long