may

walking, first birthday parties, cake, balloons, mothers day, levi...

these are a few things that have been on my mind the last few days. may holds a varied amount of emotion for this family. may held a promise of something new and exciting. when we found out in september we were elated and quickly told friends and family of our news.

then came october, and our lives were rocked to the core.
"i'm sorry but the news isn't good" those words still echo in my mind.

so here we sit, another year has passed. our little guy would have been a year old now, or close to a year old. he would have been toddling around full of giggles and fun. we would have been planning his first birthday party filled with fun. I often sit and snuggle Levi and wonder how he is different than the baby I once carried. I wonder how our lives would be now if we had a 1 year old running around.

But yet.. I'm incredibly thankful for our son who brings us indescribable joy each and every day. He is the little light of our lives, He is the guy who can make me smile with his smiles at 3am. He's the guy who is currently fast asleep in his swing with his thumb in his mouth. But most importantly, he's the man that God has entrusted to us to raise to be a godly man, to be a man of faith, to be a provider and protector for the family he will one day have.

what an incredible mission that we have been entrusted with, and for that, I'm grateful.